Odd random day

it has been a long time for me not being as a blogger to blog out my voice within my heart. Somehow i do feel like being a mindless thoughtless zombie loitering around here and there, wasting my precious time, which supposingly i need to make it beneficial. Ya, i can expect my third SAT score will end up totally disastrous, and it symbolises the end of USA dream. Such a fragile dream for a dreamer. it was just meant to be like that, or am i just giving it up too easily?

i hate super genius. i hate those who have higher brain power than those ordinary people. Why can they just end up to get everything they want but they dont need to pay any hard work? isnt that we call fair? 1% of inspiration and 99% of perspiration doesnt work on our super genius like mr einstein. There are people who are born to be better than us, there are people who are born to be super genius and braniac. I do jealous of their talent. the most annoying part is they can just get a damn high score and yet no need to study or work hard for it.

There are some of my friends, who are like walking calculators. They don't need to actually work hard on their maths or physics, yet they still get high scores. i might be paranoid about it, but it is really annoying. We keep working hard for it, but they can just stare at a very complicated physic question and solve it without involving any usage of calculator. WTH???

To most people, learning starts with failure, but to some people, learning ends with failure.

I am not gifted as a genius, i am not that brainiac. All i did is just workind hard and real hard. Study smart doesn't really work with me, or should i say, i never study smart??

may be i should revise about my study strategies and techniques... ...

out of the ordinary- the most meaningful line in my life

ya, today is quite an odd day blogging to voice up my sorrow in INTEC library computer lab.
Sometimes i do wonder why i always laugh yet i don't have happiness within my heart. My soul was once living in the happiness, and it's still. i wanted to soar, i wanted to cry, but there is of no purpose to do so anymore, as the voice of mine shall not be heard by anyone. None at all.

Thinking of you, wherever you are,
we pray for our sorrow to end,
and hope that our hearts will blend;
Now i will step forward to realize this wish,
And who knows,
starting a new journey may not so hard
or maybe it has already begun.
They are many worlds,
But they share the same sky-
One sky, one destiny.

This is my favourite line which i learnt it from a RPG PS2 game, kingdom hearts when i was in my junior high school. Eventhough it is just a simple animated game, it shows the player the true meaning of friendship, what we should really behold wherever we are in.

Our world consists of different people, with different culture, different society, you name it you got it. However, whenever we look at the blazing sun, appreciating the great creation of God when we see the sunset alongside the river, the warmth inside our hearts are the same. We share the same SKY! Despite the differences and variance, love between us should not be blocked.

Love is infinite, love is unlimited
the greatest power in the world is love

Whenever i look at this line, i feel a sense of touched. It inspired me setting aside all of our differences risen between us. It inspired me to go exploring the world, to share my love to those who live in the third world, however do share the same sky as me

"We share the same sky- one sky, one destiny" always sound so powerful when i voice it up to them. It upholds the power of family, friendship and love... ... to everyone in the world.

I always use this line as an ending in my essay to proclaim my deepest inspiration as a dreamer. Mr Steven Ong is the first teacher who agrees with me and give me confidence upon this line. "We should compete with ourselves to reach out the world," for there is not just one dreamer in this world, We Are Not Alone, Never!

All we need to do, is just take one step. You will never know, starting a new journey may not be so hard, or may be it has already begun... ....

This is not the line for Kingdom Hearts anymore, it now lies within the heart of a dreamer, once and forever.

Meaningful quote

Quotes
"How many times have you chickened out?" - Qu Hsueh Ming

"Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds." - Albert Einstein

"An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile - hoping it will eat him last." - Sir Winston Churchill

"Affirmative action is something the good don't need and the bad don't deserve" - A wise man

"The men who create power make an indispensable contribution to the Nation's greatness, but the men who question power make a contribution just as indispensable, especially when that questioning is disinterested, for they determine whether we use power or power uses us." - John F. Kennedy

"The problems of the world cannot possibly be solved by skeptics or cynics whose horizons are limited by the obvious realities. We need men who can dream of things that never were." - John F. Kennedy

"I love America more than any other country in this world, and, exactly for this reason, I insist on the right to criticize her perpetually." - James A. Baldwin

"Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is but a broken winged bird that cannot fly." - Langston Hughes

"Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference." - Sir Winston Churchill

"Dreams are true while they last, and do we not live in dreams?" - Alfred Lord Tennyson

"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education alone will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race." - John Calvin Coolidge

"We will either find a way or make one." - Hannibal

"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake." - Napoleon Bonaparte

"For evil to triumph, it is only necessary for good men to do nothing." - Edmund Burke

"War begins in the minds of men, and it is in the minds of men that the defenses of peace must first be constructed." - UNESCO Constitution

"The proper study of mankind is man." - Alexander Pope

"My kind of loyalty was loyalty to one's country, not to its institutions or its officeholders. The country is the real thing, the substantial thing, the eternal thing; it is the thing to watch over, and care for, and be loyal to; institutions are extraneous, they are its mere clothing, and clothing can wear out, become ragged, cease to be comfortable, cease to protect the body from winter, disease, and death." - Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens): A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court

"Patriotism is to support your country all the time and your government when it deserves it" - Mark Twain

"The reasonable man adapts himself to the world. The unreasonable man persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man." - George Bernard Shaw

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw

"Democracy is a system ensuring that the people are governed no better than they deserve." - George Bernard Shaw

"If we don't believe in freedom of expression for people we despise, we don't believe in it at all." -- Noam Chomsky

"During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act." - George Orwell

"When the people fear the government, you have tyranny. When the government fears the people, you have freedom." - Thomas Paine

"I sense a learning: that much dumber people than you end up in charge. Look at the way things are. I'm no fucken genius or anything, but these spazzos are in charge of my every twitch. What I'm starting to think is maybe only the dumb are safe in this world, the ones who roam with the herd, without thinking about every little thing. But see me? I have to think about every little fucken thing." - Vernon God Little, Act II

one year or two year

it seems impossible for a denverian to fly to USA in one year. I know it, everyone knows it. It is a difficult task, a difficult choice to be made. If i choose to fly in one year, my ADFP life will be a life full of torturing. I miss my friends, i miss my hometown, i miss Malaysia. Eventhough there are many weaknesses about Malaysia, it is still my dearest country. I love Malaysia, that is for sure. Seeing all those trees, seeing the beautiful sceneries when i was in the express train to KLIA.

But, Malaysian don't really know how to appreciate their gifts, or should i put it in this way, Malaysians have been counting their blessings for such a long time till they do not know how to improve themselves?

No offence to anyone, however, if i feel contented, i will not go and enchance myself. i will just constrain myself in my small little world. That is why i felt so excited when i was in intec. An excitement aroused me, especially when i get the chance to be in the same class with the other 16A1. This is just too amazing. What is the probability for 3 16A1 to be in the same class?

Back to the point, i really want to aim for the highest and the best. I aim for the best, as always, despite that i am not the best. But i always have my companion accompany me towards all those challenges, yet! I believe, in this small Intec, there are others who have the same dream as me, they are sharing the same dream as mine.

My favourite line- there are many worlds, but they share the same sky! One sky, One Destiny!

Gambate, Akira, i know you are the best! As the time being, i will improve myself and have big progression in my study! 'Cause, i never felt contented with my knowledge that i had learnt!

a piece of my wonderland

these few days were as ordinary as ever will it shall be, which i had a hectic life studying all those bombastic words from SAT, sitting exams of English and Maths, and having some aching issue about my SAT practice test. it was terrible, horrible, nauseing, boring and somemore confusing, except for the maths part which i felt like kinda easy and tricky.

Not until that, i just realize that, my basic in english is poor, super poor, incredibly poor; and, i am living in a world full of competitive scholars. it is a big world, for me to discover and explore it.

i don' t think Malaysian's English is poor, what i think is, Sarawakian's English is real poor. i am not going to be like criticizing my own tanah air, but, i was intimitated by west malaysian's capabilities in their english.

walking in Intec, i am wondering, how am i going to improve my english. I felt regret of not learning my english properly.

today is the third saturday since i came to intec. yet, there is no significant improvement in my English. i might dare to speak out loud about my own opinions, but sometimes it seems that i cannot catch their meanings or i cannot express my thoughts sound and clear. it is annoying!

i really do want to improve my english, at least in this coming 2 months.

Hobart is God-like among ADFP (american degree foundation program), and tian kang is like the disciple of him. seriously, they are good in their study. What it the point i am a 16A1 yet i cannot speak fluently, elaborate my thoughts meaningfully.

may be i shouldn't live in my past glory. it was just SPM.

Actually i am getting to use with the life as an ADFP student, having assignments and presentations everyday and everynight. Fantabulous, not that dull and boring as A level. With my unique name, every lectures can remember my name, and me.

When Miss Asma praised my essay as "not bad! I like your thinking" and Miss Nadiah's "Right" actually gave me some sort of affirmation and encouragement. As the time being, i will improve, i believe it.

Learning starts with failure, the first failure is the beginning of education. We just have to try, once more!

Hope i can become the collegemates of ivy league's students.

i am angry, nope, i am sad and frustrated

these few days were my moodiest days. after suspecting i got sow flu, which it ended up to be just a false alert. thanks god for saving me from ah1n1 this deadly disease. i want to help preventing this disease, not spreading it. besides, i cant imagine my life what if i really get ah1n1.

however, things started to get nasty when i found out that i lost my phone. my precious nokia 5800, i lost it accidentally, or got it stolen by anyone, including my roomate which i am still suspecting him now. somehow, i cannot blame anyone for the lost of my phone, everything is because of my carelessness and my unconscious. I had lost my phone for 3 times in this one whole year. sometimes i really damn myself for my carelessness. my mood was really down for the last whole weekend, which i felt totally neglected by my friends.

Where were they? what were they doing? Why were they not calling me? If yes, why they didnt realise that i had lost my phone?

i felt abandoned, i felt neglected. i felt a total loneliness.

i cried, not because i had lost my phone. i cried because i had no true friends who really cared about me despite i had all those long list of contact numbers. what is the point to have such a long list of friends while there is none of them your true friends which can really lend you a hand when you are in need?

A friend in need is a friend indeed. the only idiomatic phrase that i can remember.

my phone might have got stolen, but my spirit of studying can never be challenged, despite the fact that i am in denver now... ...

somehow i really do wonder, what is the true meaning of friend? Are those who share your happiness your friends??

for a boy, it is hard to find a male friend who really does share your hardship with you. They will just laugh at your suffering, and pretend nothing happens.

to me, a friend is a person who share happiness with you but readily lend you a hand when you are in need.
They understand you, they listen to you, they appreciate your friendship, they are readily sacrifice for you

They laugh with you, they smile to you, they appreciate your existance, they are readily show you their love

thanks those who accompanied me when i was down in the deepest abyss facing those obstacles.

a new start, totally brand new world

i am now living with my collegemates, who are all jpa scholars (except one who is a Mara student), somehow i felt like being threathen as the best student. eventhough i am a 16A1, or should i say, i WAS a 16A1.

walking every distance throughout INTEC, i was astonished by the mere ability of all scholars from the whole Malaysia, they are more than just good, they are all- rounder. My indian housemate could actually spelling and memorize SAT words while MSN with his friends, which i was totally impressed.

"no matter you are 10A1, or 20A1s, you are nothing in INTEC." these line actually replenished my motive and my desire to excel myself in order for me to success. what is actually a successful student in INTEC? those who can fly are students who success in INTEC. For me this smally fishy in this vast ocean, i am scared. realllllll scared!!! !!!

what if i failed, what if i cant fly??? furthermore, my major is BIOTECH, which is not a very common course in US, if i target to ivy league, i need to change my course, i need to change major... ... i need to change my dream in order to fullfill my ultimate dream.

today's is a somber day, which light is blocked by the dull cloud, metarphorically symbolises my sad feeling... ...

maybe i should be more optimistic to INTEC, this is a chance, an opportune time for me to prove to everyone in INTEC, 16A1 is not just an empty puppet, he is AKIRA

and i am the boy who is remarkable for his stupidity

Should be proud of myself, or not??

with my roomates now, my buddies during my life in intec, a college named Kolej Cendana
while bloging, my heart pumps like nonstop bass amplifier, as i am worried whether i get suspended by the stupid acts. i hate those rules, hate those stubborn codes. nobody should tell us what should we wear or how should we dress.

never judge a book by its cover, neither underestimate one's true ability and capability in study.

as, iceburg shows only 10% of its peak above the water surface, while the rest is hid underneath the water surface, remains unknown to others.

this is what i learnt after one week staying with my roomates and having a funky week with my collegemates. Everyone is nice and approachable, which totally undo all my misconception towards intec

while i try my very best to suit myself towards this whole new life and brace myself towards new challenges and obstacles, yet there are others who are trying to pull my down, or just pulling my legs??

await for a change in my life, a whole new life, as i had been suffering my whole secondary life submiting to tyrancy of my enemies who my arrogance made. may be it is destined, it is written... ...

Vanessa said that i should be proud of myself, as i am famous throughout the intec as MR evil / 16A1. Everyone is spreading my rumours. sometimes i really don't know how to act towards all these, to the detriment of my life.

hidden beneath my sky, staring at the blues, i am praying for a change in my life... ...

i should be proud of myself or not? For the first time in my life a feeling of overpowering stinging melancholy seized me.

my first post in english

hi

i am a dreamer, a young guy who is chasing his dream to become a top scholar, a top researcher

he is cute, literally, he is a silly cutie hotie with a simple mind

stupefied, petrified by his appearance

hold on what i believe in

keep up what i am holding on

sustainable over a period of forever, that is what i believe in

an everlasting legend, a forever fable story the future generation will be talking about

with his style, with our sustained hard work

nothing is impossible, impossible is nothing, and i am the nothing,

i am the nobody who dares to explore the world unexplored

Never confine yourselves to the world of yours, as the sky of our dream is endless

we share the same sky despite there are many worlds

of different peoples from all walks of life

this is my infinite sky with endless hopes and future,

for those who dare to dream

dare to share the sky with me