SAT

yeah, tomorrow is going to be my SAT. a deadly iq test which, to me, is just playing around obscure, bombastic english words in order to confuse the candidates. These few weeks i was unable to manage my time properly for my SAT preparation. Such a day-dreamer i am for keep blafing that i am going to fly in one year with such a mediocre result. I am a mundane person without any special skills. I am not an adept debater, i am not a aesthetic artist, i am not a prolific writers. Basically, i am just a little bit more than just nothing, just a litttttle bit more.

Despite all odds, i am going to try this out: applying my dream universities, challenging myself to the loftiest peak of US, and making myself beyond just an ordinary person. Looking in the mirror i saw my eyes, glaring with fire of determination. I know i want to fly in one year! The simplistic reason behind all these redundant extraneous businesses is i thrive on challenge myself. I live, i respire, i do everything that makes me alive, like a human walking under the sunshine zealously. I want to embelish my life with passionate activities, things that i foremost fancy about it; one of them is actually drawing. Holding my paint brush and scintillating my colors on the piece of paper generate my heart beats and my nerve impulses.

Staying here for the next month, i just realized that i have been here for more than 3 months. A lot of things had happened in between each one of us. Hwa, Drew, Law, Kiong, Xav, Hong, Dvd... ... the list is endless. All these sibu-zai are staying on the same area for the last few months. Things have changed between each one of us. I am not sure is this change change for the better or for the worse? Only until now did i discover that human relationship is so volatile and capricious. The first few months i can see that many of them are together. Sibu zai always eat together, walk together in or off campus, talk together in foo chow. We have been going through many things together for 3 months in Shah Alam; however, things are blatant that we are disintegrating in between us. We are diverging among us, the what-so-called "the unbreakable, and we are leaving away from this group, like creating a new branch from the main stem of one tree named SIBU.... .....

IF i get admitted into the ivies (just an assumption), the first person that i will definitely miss the most is lawrance- a boy who always act mischievously with a facetious expression on his face that amused me so much until i cant stop laughing at all. There is drew, a serious-type student who looks erudite in school. Those from the ALM, the girls and the boys, i am going to miss them too. May be those who are heartless regard these "fellowship" as nonsense, but it is not the intrepid feeling to do any dangerous thing that makes you a man, but the courage to face your greatest fear deep inside your heart makes you the strongest man in the world. I never feel ashamed of my fragile heart, my sentimental feeling which can cry whenever i was touched... ... I will never get used to this seclusive feeling, the feeling of being seperated by faith and destiny.

Everyone is definitely going to be part of a memory of someone. Do i still belong to one of your memories, hwa?