Some New things in 2010 for kira :P

Here is a list of things that I really like to share with you guys :P

I want to change, and still be the quirky me. I don't want to change my eating style, my sitting pose, my sleeping motion or so just to fit in, but I want to change in order to avoid those 2009 cliche and glitches that happened on me. Damn miserable incidents! Although they seem to be minor and harmless, they are one of my greatest cancer-causing agents!

a frisbee taken from life game, so what is it exactly? :P

Yup, the 1st damn glitch is LACK OF SPORTS! Spending too much time watching anime until I lacked some sort of exercise, like running or playing around. I gained 3 kg again after my Intec journey began. (damn it) Now, with latest technology (in sarawak :) ) I must get slimmer this spring semester. They say spring season is the most hectic season for ADFP students. Let's see how impactful it will do to me :P

Ok ><>

It is, not about the books around indeed, but the arrangement of the books. The table used to be so disorganized and messy until Pn Jamiliah had given me a warning. I can't even find my own SAT examination slip 6 hours before the real SAT examination in Subang. It cost me to squander 1 hour just to hunt down my slip beneath the sea of books, technological stuff and so on. Now, my table will be clean and tidy with aromatic flavor around it (haha) and some forbidden stuff being hidden around.

genetics, calculus and whatsoever. What's happening to your life? I thought you despise books as they are not environmental-friendly?

Books do make a genius from nothing. If I lived in a house so glamorous like nat's, I can probably become a genius too. I had been exposed to different field of science and interest which truly intrigue my learning enthusiasm. I want to know more about biological stuff in depth. No more time will never be my excuse to avoid reading informatics books. * unless it is damn soporific.

A photo taken in your house back in your hometown, Sibu in Sarawak? Nice job, too bad we need something more than just that mundane.

Nope, that photo was not taken in my own house back in my hometown, Sibu, but it is taken in my room, Kolej Cendana. yup, I had just bought myself a Yamaha Piano for my own pleasure. I want to revive my old dream, and it is never too old for you to jump over and get into admitted by Brown. Piano will be my new leisure activity that I can play with this arriving semester.

There are a lot more new things that have been going through me, like doing new account system to control his own budget, having my class in Austin but not the Austin that I understand.

Hope that my new year resolution can be wished

2010 :P

After KJ's comment, I decided to write something happy about my life.

Hmmm mmm mmm

Hmmm mmm mmm

Hmmm mmm mmm

Hmmm mmm mmm

Can't think of anything. :P, I guess my idea flows only when I am in great tension, or depression, or great supression.

(I didn't want to make my blog into a diary though, haha. what is the point to keep mentioning whom you go out with for lunch? unless it stands for some significance. )

These few days I was rushing for my application, and I shouldn't get into much details as they do have technology to find out about me :P

After this process, I truly learn what "there is always people who are greater than you" means. I came to know this noel who is a real physics genius that has true passion in both music and physics (especially in quantum physics), Victor, my roommate, a quirky Einstein-worshiper, and I am currently following his study habit :P (He would have never know that I am now assimilating him), YL, a homosexual who scores higher than hobart, Ching Yee who favors in chemical engineering yet takes biology. There are a lot of cool people that I had come to know, and I truly feel that 5s4 is a small village indeed.

What we have been acting in the class, is just stupid, immature and arrogant, living in our own world without realizing that there are a lot of people who want to make a big difference. They are the real geniuses, the real pioneers in future. I am fully impressed by them.

I guess that is what makes US different from the other educational curriculum. :p

There is the Malay who has this wonderful ideas about travelling and mind stones. There is the experiment psycho tk who dressed up like a girl just to understand how a girl thinks. A reincarnated kite by HL, miss that 一生不幸， miss those engineers. They really prove to me that engineers are a bunch of cool kids who know what is life.

I too want to be more like them. That's the very least that I learnt in my application. I am still too mediocre and mundane and pedestrian. I have been living in my own, small little world for such a long time. I had been wasting so much money just to fulfill my lust and needs :p

2010 is a new start for me, and I anticipate a new me who had just turned over a new leaf. Everyday I promised myself that I will learn more about genetics and microbiology even though they are not in my exam syllabus. I will polish up my piano skill and redefine myself as a true artist. I will utilize my gifted talent in doing more goods, to glorify his name as a Christian. Doing more exercise, playing futsal.

Last but not least, I am grateful to my tutor, Nat(although he is sarcastic and harsh towards our essays, he is such a talented genius) for bringing me to a new level of thinking and new perspective of insight towards this world.

2010 stands another meaning to me to, that's my SAT 1 mediocre score (2nd attempt) I found that I do have a gift in mathematics (especially I score 800 in maths 2 which I did none for the preparation since it is a last-minute decision :P) I will work hard in my maths, not blaming anyone again for my failure. This is my greatest resolution, version 2010, and I WILL ACHIEVE IT! I HAVE TO!!! !!!

For sure, I hope for the best to my classmates in 5s4 2008, 0903pm10 and old denver 2009. All the best!

"I thought We could have more time!"

Still remember this reminiscence of 2012? This is the most impactful line that I had encountered throughout my life! Seriously, I don't really get touched when I read John 3:16, but I was moved by this line. (I don't really get the part of non-Christian being moved by John 3:16 in every drama starring by most of the Fellowship in Sibu Church. No offence but it is very weird for a person who gets education to have never heard of the name Jesus Christ)

I think our daily livings lie on this basic: We thought We could have more time. Procrastination, escapism, alcoholism and so on. We always thought we could have more time, we could be given more time, and because of this assumption, we tend to postpone what's more important to us.

The moment I get the book of life "我的生命手册", I planned to use my time wisely and efficiently. The book has 10 columns, and I thought that the game lasted for 1o columns. (only those who had participated in Lifegame know what I am talking about :p) I thought the judgment day was on the forth day, which is the last day of our life game. I really have the perception that I have enough time to get baptized in the game and get myself into the heaven.

In fact, I didn't, and I couldn't.

Everything turns out to be unexpected. The judgment day fell right on the 3rd day, and we are only at the 7th columns in the book of life. All my money, my reputation, my everything was turned into ashes.

I was given a chance. I knew the true location of the church which can get myself into the heaven right in the early morning. However, due to insufficient money to pay my debt, I was real hooked by my job. I kept selling and earning more money. Greed has overcome my sub-conscious. I neglected the church, and I thought I have enough time to get myself baptized, and get into heaven.

Time flies, doesn't it? And I think I am a real jerk, for not appreciating my time and chance. The remorse of not getting myself into heaven plagued me for few days, and I hope the effect plagues me forever- to remind me of the importance of time.

Now, my application is all in a mess, I don't really have much time. I used to think that I could have more time, but now I think I could have more courage and faith in God. I want to give up, but the impacts are still within me. It's a hard time, a tough journey, a no-return adventure. I hope my high school friends understand the true meaning of the IMPORTANCE OF TIME.

I hope he can read through this blog before he starts saying, "I thought I could have more time."

All the best, 2009 ends with a new kira born; 2010 starts with a new kira moving onwards with a smile and glitter on his face.

Location: Kolej Cendana, SHAH ALAM (I thought I was the only stupid fella who come here damn early, it seems that some other 2 took the same plight as I was. Thanks to them, and thanks to God, I manage to get an accommodation before I get my room back from the office :) )

Situation: us application ><>

Action: Listen to the music, blogging, tahan my stomachache until I go INTEC. writting essays

Tension: timeless and fearful

Aspiration: Have faith in God, have confidence in yourself, have inspiration behind every action.

What if I can change the world without changing myself? Life impacts 3

I was impressed by the lifegame. It has so many stories for me to tell about, lots of reminiscent during the game until I need to split my blogs into several parts just to write about its impacts towards my life.

(i need to do some sort of statistics research in order to find out which topics I like to talk much about. Probably the bad things win :p)

I am getting a lot better now, thanks to lots of paracetamol and sing kung chui? I had been nauseaing even before the award ceremony in Hilton, in the toilet of my hostel during life game and so on. Lawrence will never know that I actually took 10-15 pills of panadol before and after the MJ dance. He's right: my life has stepped into the ills and pills phase. :) is that a good news or a bad news?

It's rather worldly, but this time I would like to emphasize on what roles should a person play in a complex society. Each of us has his or her own role to play. Either he is a policeman, or a lawyer, or a businessman, or a salesgirl, he or she is part of the bigger picture. Each one of us are interconnected and interrelated.

It is like a big jigsaw puzzle. In order for you to form the edge or a specific part of the bigger puzzle, you must link those pieces which are related together. For a complete jigsaw puzzle to be constructed, none of the pieces shall be forgotten. The missing pieces might be small, but the whole puzzle will never be completed.

That's why we all have the ability to change the world. It doesn't matter whether it is big, or small. It's a changing world, and we are the factors, the enzymes, the buffers.

Copenhagen's discussion over global climatic changes finally end. Obviously everyone knows that we need to do something in order to protect the earth, especially the Malaysian. Let's just put it into a very simple question, "DO YOU RECYCLE?"

We can definitely do something for the earth. That's why we are called human beings. We have the social ability to organize and interact as a community; we have the intellectual ability to know the ethical things that we should do.

However, what is the point changing the world but without the ability to change yourself for the better?

Every one of us (most of us) has big aspiration. But don't forget that our life is like a piece of record. What we had done were all recorded in the book of life. It has influenced lots of people: your family, relatives, friends, mates, and so on. They become your true testimonies around the world.

Congratulation to my aunt for not only getting a nice husband in her marriage, a Luxurious wedding in Rh hotel, but also lots of nice testimonies from her friends. "cheerful, innocent girl" "helpful angel"... ... Judging from their looks, I know that all those testimonies about my aunt are real and touchy.

If you are going to die tomorrow, what do you wish your friends to say about you during your ceremony? Are they going to talk about your great ambitions and contributions to the world, or your effort to become a better person among them?

The choice lies in me, and I believe my friends have more than that to say about me.

life impacts 2- my family

A 16A1 initiated my new journey to realize my dream. But how many knows the true story behind this tragedy? I am not that surprised as mentioned in the article, but there were a lot of people who did really feel surprised, in a bad way, I meant


What does 16A1 really mean? After joining the life game, I realized that I was being famous not only for dancing MJ during "残酷一丁", but also for being a 16A1. Among my juniors, I am like a super hero, a legend, a sophisticated figure who did miracles with ingenious brain power. From my juniors' perspective, I am not as bad as how my peers viewed me. (I am glad for that :p and I appreciate it)

My life was deemed as a glorious life full with fantastic achievements. However, does it really matter?

My dad installed a DVD screen in my own car. It's a weird feeling watching American Pie while driving, you know. (but the music is cool!)

My own CRV, a gift from my dad.

Somebody view it as my own effort: I earned it with my hard works; I earned it with my result and reputation gained in SPM 2008. I had all the privileges that my dad can offer me. Whether I want the latest handphone or a luxurious vacation in the Prince, I can always get what I want. Others view me as a lucky boy who was born in elite class (not that kind of Manhattan's elite class you saw in Gossip Girl, my hometown type) ; despite my results I will always be treated with a great deal of indulgence.

It was cool to meet Mr. Mahmud in person, an experience that is hotly discussed among my family members.

So, what's the point of working hard when you got everything that you want to have? What is the point to strain yourself for something that you don't really need to? Am I being too ambitious or lion-hearted until I overworked myself?

How many of my fans, and peers, know that my family is not born rich? Ta Ann isn't looked like that before its immense growth in international business. My dad, similar to my other granduncles and uncles, sacrificed his own health to sustain the growth. My house used to be cupboard house in the primitive village, and it is still there. Our first car was actually a white Proton Saga. I wasn't born genius: I might have some cracky ideas about life and philosophy. I have mediocre SAT score even though I sat it twice!

That's the reason. I experienced the poverty once, I really know how others feel when they don't have food to eat. (that's why I sacrifice my own lunch in the lifegame.) I know that this luxury isn't something gifted as granted; it is my previous generation that helps sustaining it. I admit that sometimes I do practice escapism through severe procastination, but that doesn't hinder me from my ultimate goal.

We can't really choose our own origins, can we? We can't choose which family do we have, or what our DNA is. All we can choose is the way we live as well as the road we take now and in the future.

In life game, I really learnt that life is not about my past, it's about my present and my future that I want to live. I was given nothing in the game, except for mediocre money and a business ownership. I survived until the end, didn't I? I can survive without my family's rich background. I can survive with $10000 debt. I can survive without getting a tertiary education. I survived through lots of determination.

Things don't change much whether or not I am in a prosperous family or a peasant family. I have always want to maintain my family's pride and prosperity as well as create a better future for both my family and my friends. Well, let's not forget about the bigger picture: the world that we live now. It needs change, but where are those who are going to change it?

let's leave that part until my next blog.

My current situation?

stomachache, nauseaing, severe muscle cramp, headache, diarrhea.

I missed the Christmas celebration in church :(

I was reminded

I was seeking an answer for a question that I long asked before: why did I become apathetic towards God? Is it because of my plethora of things that I want? Behind the race, I decided to find the answer in life game- a life impact ministries organized in my hometown. In order to rediscover my life purpose, I took a break in my application process.

And now, I had it: the answer.

"Today I am stepping across the line. I'm tired of waffling, and I'm finished with wavering. I've made my choice, the verdict is in; and my decision is irrevocable. i'm going God's way. there's no turning back now!

I will live the rest of my life serving God's purposes with God's people on God's planet for God's glory. I will use my life to celebrate his presence, cultivate his character, participate in his family, demonstrate his love, and communicate his World.

Since my past has been forgiven and I have a purpose for living and a home awaiting in heaven, I refuse to waste any more time or energy on shallow living, petty thinking, trivial talking, thoughtless doing, useless regretting, hurtful resenting, or faithless worrying. Instead, I will magnify God, grow to maturity, serve in ministry, and fulfill my mission in the membership of his family.

Because this life IS preparation for the next, I will value worship over wealth, 'we' over 'me', character over comfort, service over status, and people over possessins, position, and pleasures. i know what matters most, and i'll give it all I've got. I'll do the besst I can with what I have for Jesus Christ today.

I won't be captivated by culture, manipulated by cirtics, motivated by praise, frustrated by problems, debilitated by temptation, or intimidated by the devil. I'll keep running my race with my eyes on the goal, not the sidelines or those running by me. When times get tough, and I get tired, I won't back up, back off, back down , back out or backslide. I'll just keep moving forward by GOd's grace. I am spirit-led, purpose-driven and mission-focused, so I cannot be bought, I will not be compromised, and I shall not quit until I finish the race.

I'm a trophy of God's amazing grace, so I will be gracious to everyone, grateful for everyday, and generous with everything that God entrusts to me.

To my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, I say: However, whenever, wherever, and whatever you ask me to do, my answer in advance is yes! wherever you lead and whatever the cost, I'm ready. Anytime. Anywhere. Anyway. Whatever It takes Lord; whatever it takes! I want to be used by you in such a way, that on that final day I'll hear you say. "Well done, thou good and faithful one! Come on in, and let the eternal party begin!""

This race is not just about who can run faster at first, but who can run towards the end successfully.

I had learnt not to give up at whatever cost. I can achieve a lot of incredible thing as long as I believe in it. Though I was in debt of $9000 during the game, with great determination, I was able to turn it around and maximized my profit with the least that I had. If I gave up at that particular moment, I might just get killed.

First lesson that I had learnt is NEVER GIVE UP! I had given up once and it ended with remorse. I had 10 days; each day can be as meaningful as 30 days that they have. May God bless those who are busy in their application for not forgetting God's presence.

All the best! I won't repeat the mistake that I had made in Lifegame. Thanks God it was just a game; and Thanks God for giving me a second chance to play my life.

I was warned

I was warned, not by my best friends, but by an interviewer who is an alumni from the most prestigious university in US.

"You must know where the line is, and remember, don't ever cross the line, or else you will end up to be a very dangerous criminal."

This is the quote which gave me the most impact throughout my day. I know it is not offensive, but quite touching for me. I don't think there is any interviewer who will give any advice to his or her interviewee. I was grateful for what he had said to me throughout the whole session.

But for some privacy issue, I don't think it is genius by mentioning which college interview did i attend. (those hackers, as well as hypocrites, like to plagiarize my idea and give non-constructive opinions which I think it is totally a waste of my time, and also their time)

I mentioned about Kung Hui (yo fren, long time no chat lo, still in detention?) in the colored fire experiment. Still remorseful about the explosion that I create when doing colored fire that burned his hand. I never realize how dangerous the situation we were in when I made the chemicals so volatile and flammable by heating up alcohol and chemicals. It was dangerous, and I was way too young to realize the dangers behind an experiment.

I sneak into loophole when doing projects. In fact, I don't do things in orthodox ways. I like to be different from the others, that's why I used my creativity to do something which others never try out. However, there are something that I myself would like to experience it, like visiting the gynecology department in the hospital. It is quite impossible for just a high school student to experience something like that. Since you are given a chance, why not?

There is one similarity between the interviewer and nat: they both mentioned I should not follow what my heart tells me, or follow my emotion. That is quite true. In fact, it is a homework that I have been working out for the whole year. I learn how to think rationally, how to judge others without any sentimental bias towards the others and how to analyse every situation from different perspective.

I think that's what I really learnt through the application process. No matter I get myself admitted or not, ( this could be a real hot topic discussed by every Malaysian if I didn't get admitted, just like how they spread rumors about Nur Amalina who gets 17A1, and I was so stupid for not googling out the truth) at least I learnt something, things that my peers from Tung Hua will never learnt. I was exposed to people like Yl or ZY or Hobart; they might not know how much they had inspired me to do something different, not for myself, but for the world that we are soon gonna face.

Then what is university for? In my perception, it was used to be a place where I think I can get a tertiary education in order to get a job in my future, but not now as I realize Universities are there for you to rediscover your dream and aspiration, realizing the passion in your heart for you to change the world, even if it is just a minor change.

I was warned, and now it is time for me to think for the people around me. I was thinking may be it is the 2012 movie that led However, I must be honest that I was hooked by 3 major things in my life: games, anime and funny Taiwanese talkshow. The main thing that I must learn now is how to create 72 hours from 24 hours. Hehe :p

Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, Isaac Newton, Gregor Mendel and Charles Darwin: they all share the same 24 hours as me.